Friday, March 2, 2007

And the verdict is...

Guilty... of being hosed by the city of Philadelphia. As you may know, I had my big traffic court date last night. The trial of the century, yeah, that's the one. Well, I get there ready to kiss judicial ass, in the rain, it's 9 at night, I'm walking around a desolate Spring Garden St, you get the picture. Then it dawns on me... "Dave, get your wet ass back in your car. Court is adjourned." AS IN THEY WERE COMPLETELY CLOSED!

I should have known, after the 8 spelling mistakes on my ticket... yeah, that court date? Probably about as legit as any phone number I got in early high school. But I fell for it! Looks like ol' Milton aint the only one with tricks up his sleeve! You got me, Johnny Street!

Let's see: pulled over questionably, a ticket ridden with mistakes, pay a huge fine, and a fraud court date. Where am I, Mexico?! It's in situations like these where you just gotta say...

Milton for Mayor!

I'm outta here. I need this vacation. If anybody finds a judge, tell them to call me!