Wednesday, February 28, 2007

Hung Like King Tut

Well we didn't have Indiana Jones in-studio today, or the "Boy King" himself, but our buddy Mark did spark my interest in the ongoing slice of history at the Franklin Institute. Apparently this Egypt place was much more than a failed nightclub on Delaware Ave! I gotta go check this out, I mean this Tut exhibit seems pretty badass. And as for the Institute itself, I have never been! And I pretend to like history. Scoff at me. Please, do it.

Ahhh, much better. Vindicated. Anyway yeah, so I think I'm gonna go! A real favorite of girlfriends everywhere: a history date!

"Hey, sweetie? I was thinkin... we should probably go out this weekend. I wanna take you to the city..."

"Ooooh! What restaurant?! The new Stephen Starr?! There's this great new club that opened in olde City, I been needing to shop anyway, hey can we stop--"

"Actually I was thinking about a decomposing grave exhibit"

Try that one on for size. Works like a charm. No, actually, I'm a lucky dude cause my girl's been begging to hit up the old Franklin Institute. We'll see when we can score free passes, then I'll tell ya all about it. Until then, I'll be working on my chin-goatee.

Peace in the Tut-free Middle East!

Tuesday, February 27, 2007

Weekend Shenanigans

It was a decent time this weekend... celebrating graduation with tons of fam/ friends in the snow. We had all kinds of food, spirits... sleds to entertain the masses (in that order). My Grandparents even showed up and hung out, God Bless'em, at 81 and 85! They were walking around better and straighter than me by night's end.

But it was a great time. Who needs volleyball and horseshoes when you have winter combined with a 100 yard BACK yard?! Sloped with an icy coating and frozen-solid finish-line pond. That was the VIP area by mid-party. As in "Very Idiotic Person". Or perhaps "Various Injuries Protruding". That said, anyone who was anyone was out, tabogan or saucer in hand, tearing up the backyard hill. We had everything, from coon hounds flying down the hill, to bloody knuckles, to bone fragments seeing the light of graduation day! Hang tight. I have proof. It's gonna warm my mom's heart to go through my graduation photo album and see my cake... me and girlfriend, smily happy graduates... busted shin bone.

Much love to my family for coming out unlike all my lazyass friends in Allentown. You had nothing to do with my graduating anyway! Peace.

Friday, February 23, 2007

Party Time

Well, this weekend isn't exactly prone to busting out the old volleyball net and shuttlecocks (I'm just writing this blog to use that word). Nor is it exactly prime for setting up tents with loads of food, while seeing your Dad walk around in shorts with his camera. What in God's name am I talking about? I'm referring to my graduation party, of course!

I and the lovely girlfriend just had our January graduation from Temple U, hence the coldest party this side of the Polar Bear Club. Should be pretty sweet though, I mean we are getting a half-keg? That's how you know you are getting old. A half keg. Pfff! I can just hear the frat boy insults ringing in my head. Yes, either getting old, or your friends are just lazy and you know you'll get stuck suckin' it down with Grandma. But, one thing is for sure- the best idea was to get a bigass pig to pull apart! A pork-pull, as they say. If they had college in Medieval times, you know that's how it'd go down! We are going super oldschool.

So, obviously we didn't graduate from THAT kind of Temple. Kind of a red flag. But the one we did grad from makes our families very happy, and celebrate we shall. Should be quite frightening, actually, it is the seminal "meeting of the parents". So, sorry Mom, no keg stands this time.

Peace in the hopefully melting backwoods of Quakertown this weekend!

Thursday, February 22, 2007

I'm officially a geek.

Hey! I'm back. I apologize for lack of insight the other day. Actually, I apologize for lack of insight every day. But you are here, so I guess there's something compelling you! I know. Trainwrecks are always fascinating. Well, wreck I shall! Yesterday i flew outta here faster than Britney in rehab, and for what reason?! I had a miriad of errands to run, the most important of which? I bought more RAM for my computer.

There is no porn in that equation whatsoever, so just stop. Although I see your point. And it is pretty freakin hilarious. But! What I'm referring to is Random Access Memory. The stuff that allows your porno to have less start and stop, a quicker load, etc. Oh Christ. Forget it! RAM. Computer chips! This stuff is treated like porno in the geek world. It's the gold standard for nerd status. Normal dudes brag about how many chicks they've plugged. Nerds brag about how much RAM they've plugged in lately! I'm serious.

I remember being in high school and hanging with the token computer nerd from the grade above... Garrett. Big, dopey Garrett. He once asked me what I thought he should invest in next. It was big decision time for him and his savings. "New car? Or more RAM???"

I could have taken the dad-joke route of, "Well, have you considered the Dodge_Ram?!" But instead I just punched him.

And now I have fallen/ risen (?) into the same category. I can't believe it, but hey... I did it. It's cool. I went home last night with two beauties from the local Best Buy. Two sweet little things, 512 mb dimensions, both in green, twins I think! Went home, inserted them inside, and I was up and working, just like that. Incredible speed! Multi-tasking never was better! More boxes up at once! What's not to love?!

Where's the geek sheet at? Sign me up. Guys, I'm telling you, RAM it up!

Tuesday, February 20, 2007

Classic Rock meets Hip Hop?

It's official- Run DMC is on tour with Aerosmith again! Yeah right. If you believed me... it's official- you just got hosed. But it's all good, because the second coming of classic rock meeting hip hop HAS, in fact, happened. And gimmicky albums like Jay-Z's 'Black' being mixed with The Beatles' 'White' to form 'The Grey Album' does not count. Pure rubbish!

I'm talking about the fusion of a classic rock INTERN with alter-ego, bedroom hip hop mega-producer. It may sound like a shameless plug, but guess what? It's my freakin' blog. I'm just doin my damn job! So there you have it. Indeed, as of late I have gotten my recording back in gear, and while I haven't interviewed foreign political leaders for the show... or banged out any exclusive jingles for the next big CONTEST... you can still check out the goods (and tell me how much my generation sucks, musically).

Allz ma beats is found right here

I'm sure John would love to pump my beats on air, but sadly, our format is a bit skewed for their sound. Couple things are lacking. Mainly, classic, and rock. But thanks in advance!

Friday, February 16, 2007

Italian Invasion

Today's show was pretty intense. I felt like I had wandered into the Italian Market on a summer afternoon... there was all kinds of Italian-speak flying over my head! Unfortunately, there was something distinctly missing amongst this gathering- food! I am absolutely craving some straight up authentic, from scratch, napkin-tucked-into-shirt, homemade sauce-drenched Italian FOOD!

And by the way, if Italian food itself was a mafia, Olive Garden would be the rat. Don't trust that place, I tell ya!

Maybe I'll splurge and head down to 9th and Passyunk. I'll get to that right after this. I gotta. It's Friday- not payday for me, but it's the perfect time to act like it is! The sun is out, the snow is melting... what better time to eat a bigass cheesesteak?! It's been awhile anyway. Ehh, who am I kidding? I know I'm gonna go home and throw a frozen pizza in the oven.

Nuff said. Time to eat. Be safe, don't slip this weekend, and remember to hug your sweetie and tell her- to cook, dammit! Hahaha HA HA HA HA! Bye.

Peace in the Russians-posing-as-Italian-food-joints Northeast!

Thursday, February 15, 2007

Cupid Hangover

Sucks to be the flower and teddy bear delivery guy yesterday. Not only are you stuck in a big cold van cruising around in ice and snow, but everyone you meet up with is eating chocolate, warmly embracing lovers, and having sex. Sweet gig!

I thought about that since I, myself, had a tough time getting to my sweet gig yesterday. Did you notice?? Probably not. Thankfully, interns have the option of calling out here. We aren't known for our superior car power. Just star power! Does the italics translate sarcasm well? Hopefully.

So let's see... my blog. My life. Well! Had a splendid Valentine's Day/ Big One with my lovely girlfriend yesterday. The Big One is not some new 7/11 drink... I mean The big one. The milestone for high school and college kids. The endangered species of Hollywood. The one year anniversary!

I will now define 'keeper': any girl who says "don't worry about getting me anything" AND REALLY MEANS IT! We actually bought each other plane tickets for Cali this summer. And for V-day we just exchanged cards, she cooked chicken parm subs, we drank Blue Moon beer and watched movies. The end. Ok, OF COURSE other things took place but this is a family show! Hence, a family blog. We did it 8 times.

Peace in the lovenest, otherwise known as the Northeast!

Tuesday, February 13, 2007

The Police Are Coming!

Apparently in more ways than one. Sure, everyone knows that old Sting, Stew and Summers are reuniting, but what was with the helipcopters last night?! I don't know if it was over the top tour promotion or what, but the police were circling over my neighborhood for a good 15 minutes last night!

Sting's mug was not on the side of the chopper, however, nope. No mullett banner streaming from the tail-end (although how genius would that be?!). And no, not even Stewart Copeland's neandertholic thighs were to be seen dangling out of the side... just a very bright spotlight shining down into my back alley. Not the best time for an evening stroll!

So obviously, my Police World Tour promotion idea went out the window pretty quickly. I think it was right after my girlfriend reminded me we were in our PHILLY apartment (I go to Quakertown on the weekends, give me a break).

I hope Sting realizes this is Philly. The only 'message in a bottle' he's gonna find here will involve an empty 40, Roxanne stands at median off Delaware Ave on weekend nights, and 'every breath you take' brings you one step closer to Emphysema. The city paper does have some sweet Kama Sutra ads though!

Peace in the patrolled-from-above Northeast.

Friday, February 9, 2007

Booze, Babes and Balls

What a whirlwind 24 hours it's been! As promised, I went out on the town with my gal last night to celebrate her big sexy transition to 23 (and my half birthday). Does anyone still celebrate half birthdays? Remember when as a kid you'd be like "I'm 6 ennahaff". At what age does the "half" become unimportant?? When do kids start punching the kid who includes "the half"? I'll investigate...

ANYWAY. We went out. We did the center city park like you're a lab rat thing. Turn, nothing, turn, look, turn...maybe...nope, turn, keep looking, curse, turning, looking, METER! But we did not keel over and die at the end of that. We went and stuffed ourselves with food straight outta Mexican heaven! If that does, in fact, exist. What do Mexicans believe in anyway? Chupacabras. And I was bummed actually, no Filet of Chupacabra on the menu at El Vez. Kind of a bummer. Chupa Loin? Nope. Nothin.

So we ate amazingly flavorful Mexican entrees, preceded by Macho Nachos (which I took the reins on), tacked on some fried ice cream at the end and enjoyed a pitcher of Jamaican margaritas the whole. damn. tasty. time. It was great! The wind chill was not. You know it's cold out if my girl is wearing jeans on a date. Which I don't get anyway, considering you never see the legs on a dinner date! Give me a top. A sexy top! Maybe a nice plunging neckline, some foxy form-fitting fabric... just a hot top! Who cares about the bottom?! It's hidden under all that awesome food! That's all the guy wants... everything, right there. Sexy chick- kickass food right underneath. Wham. Bam! The ultimate 2-hit combo.

So yes, the date was splendid. We were so stuffed we nixed more booze (a la Lindsay Lohan) and hopped on 95 back to the East of North. An excellent decision. An excellent sleep. An excellent show this morning. Life is good goin' into the weekend!

P.S. No, I will not be trying Simon Kirke's drumming tip. He just wants to see my balls.

Thursday, February 8, 2007

Candybar Boycott In Effect

Ya know... There definitely are exceptions in life. Most people finish up college by intensive research, writing a thesis, curing cancer...

Others must cross the finish line by forced gorging, escaping homoerotic proclivitivities and man-spankings.

I am that exception. Could you guess?! Yes, today on the show you'd know I am passing this final stage of education/ indoctrination with flying colors. Ok, rainbow colors. With a splash of pink.

Anyway, to quote a girl I heard out front of my stoop the other day, "Isss whateva". I don't care. When it comes to the shared Snickers bar, Brian's lips were not "giant" enough to even brush mine, and I escaped, unscathed! They got some crack, but not the whole back. Suckas!

And of all days, it's my gal's birthday today! And my HALF Birthday! I am going home to make out with my hot chick after this. You hear that?! Female. Shaved legs. Soft lips. Boobs. Huge freakin' boobs. Awesome! Yes! Now I'm back. I am BACK, baby. Maybe we will do the Snickers stunt and tape it for John! Actually... nah... inevitably Go Go would somehow "borrow" the tape and end up injuring his wrist by later this week. I can't do that to my buddy.

But do stay tuned, I am taking her out tonight for the big celebration that my $6-infused-wallet can provide (That's what Brian woulda won had he gone the easy route). Should have stories tomorrow. Manly stories.

Peace in the Gay Rehab-free Northeast!

Wednesday, February 7, 2007

Bon Jovial

Goood morning! I had a great time this morning, I gotta admit it. Today's show was, to quote Go Go, "the shizzit". Gnarly. Kickin'. Boss to the max! Rad fer sure! And every and any other 80's term wanna throw into the pot... or should I say arena?!

Jovi was on, maaaan! NOT his songs. Jovi! The Highness of Hair himself. The Sultan of Spray! The Spawn of Spandex! The Jovi.

And I thought it was pretty cool. So I just had to throw that out there... Blog filler? Perhaps. Well I can't have amazing tales every morning! Whatever. Sue me. For all I'm not worth. Actually I should have some rather interesting yarns to spin once this week ends, what with girlfriend-birthday-Valentine's-Graduation-party-binge-drinking-naked-chick MADNESS breaking out!!!

*pause* I may have gotten a little carried away there. Well, some of that stuff is goin' down. Stick around!

And Go Philadelphia Soul! ...soul, right? I think...

Tuesday, February 6, 2007

Scrabble Addiction

So, Peyton won... '24' came in sharp AND free as ever last night... my car still takes 15 minutes and 5 restarts to warm up in this cold... not the most eventful of weekends for me. BUT! I did extend my Scrabble win-streak over my girlfriend to 5 games. And then she ended it. Decisively. Yes, on Sunday she finally got me, with a 357-point strike.

Note to couples- play Scrabble. It does something, it's magic! Pure relationship-magic. It brings your relationship this whole new level. Not just of geekdom either! I gotta tell you... It heightens competition. You always can get the last word. Wordplay is foreplay. Can you spell innuendo?! Arguments are more intellectual and chock-full of absurd words like Jag, Quat and Zonk! It's awesome.

So anyway, now my record for '07 stands at 6-5. I'll keep all you INtern Dave fans updated, don't worry. I'm bringin' down the Scrabble hammer for the DeBellaware Valley, you can bet your triple-word squares on that!

Friday, February 2, 2007

Who invented the graduation hat?

That's all I want to know. Whose idea was it to celebrate 4+ years of academic slave-labor by donning a piece of cardboard stuck into a sock, with a big string dangling from it? That was my only problem graduating yesterday. I can live with the obligatory nice shirt, tie, big black robe. But don't expect me to put up with a tassel swinging in my face for more than an hour.

But honestly, graduation was enjoyable! I was nestled between other kids whose names end in 'G', and no, Giant Brian was not one of them. Go Go? He was there. I didn't ask what was going on beneath that robe the whole time though. But I was surprised, my speakers were short, concise, even (I gotta admit it) inspiring *awww*. I loved it though, because that canceled out the gushing sorority girl with greeting card sentiments that I was expecting. "CAN YOU BELIEVE IT, GANG?! WE DID IT!"

No, my graduation was exemplary of the fine media folk that Temple U churns out. Fine future members of the television, media and radio biz gathered under one roof together. Almost like being back at The DeBella DeBall... minus all the booze.

Oh, and the only "Shout"ing was of a different kind-
'Shaniqua M. Jones'
"You GO Shaniqua! Das ma baby! Yeeaaah, girl!" *air horn*

'David W. Gibson III' *crickets chirping*

Much love to my family and grandfamily for comin' out! Love you guys.

Thursday, February 1, 2007

Today I Graduate

So give me another pass on the blog! I've been a slack and a hack writer this week. I admit it. But give me a break... I been writin' for years now (hasn't always been about embarassing life tidbits) and I'm finally getting rewarded for it today! That's right, at 1pm on N. Broad St in Philadelphia, I will be Dr. Intern Dave.

Did I also mention I tend to exaggerate more on Thursdays? Can't help it. I have weekend anxiety! I will be having a huge graduation party, with volleyball, snacks, fruit punch, backgammon... and I'm gonna have money coming out my ears! By the way I tend to miss Bill Henley's forecast on Thursdays.

So hold your pants on until I return! You'll soon find out about all the crazy moments and hilarious hijinx' of Temple University School of Communications and Theater Graduation *sigh* My Cosby-watch is in full effect.